Confessions of a (Pitiful) Wife

Eight months.

That is how long it's taken me to start getting into the swing of things after having Malachi. Embarrassing but true. I could blame part of it on working night shift and not having a babysitter during the day when I'm badly needing sleep. I could blame part of it on a decent amount of traveling. (Not going to lie- I could also blame Hulu for hours of mindless show watching. Bad mom award, right here.) But mostly I think I just let myself off the hook.

I look at my sister (or anyone who goes home with a newborn to a house filled with other children) and wonder how in tarnation she does it. If you're wondering, she just added the sweetest baby girl, Adriah Faith, to her already impressive collection of a four year old boy, and two year old twin girls. And I'm pretty sure if I were Rachel, you would find me wandering down the side of the road in my underclothes muttering something about guns and the end of the world. But she is cool. She already had three babies, what problem could one more bring?

I'm not like that. I've always been slow at completing tasks. I can get lost for hours in fiction. I want to snuggle with Josh on the couch instead of dealing with the (never-ending) dishes all over my kitchen. And we're in deep trouble now that Olympic trials are on.

I hadn't realized how messy I'd let life become until a week ago when I made an actual dinner with an actual recipe and we actually sat at the table to eat it. (Granted, the other half of the table was covered with items needing to be put away.) And I realized I felt good about making a yummy meal for my hubby. And I wondered when having a few restful weeks after Malachi's birth had turned into eight months of being a lackluster wife and making excuses.

So here goes something, folks. (I can't rightly say "here goes nothing." Because it's not nothing. We as Christians are told to work as unto the Lord. And I daresay I would be embarrassed to have him see the state of my house right now. And yes, I know He can see it. This is not meant to be a theology lesson. It's more me making an inward decision and outward commitment to do better. Because I know I can.

So, feel free to stop by my house. Anytime. And if it's a wreck, well, I deserve to be embarassed and perhaps it will spur me on.

 Just don't judge me for the bills on the table- I'm mailing them tomorrow. :)